Hey guys, today I wanted to share with you my thoughts on how to deal with a negative setback that can often lead to many negative emotions and thoughts for example; depression.
Although I wish I could sit here and say I have lived a pretty perfect life, I too have gone through some setbacks that put me in a pretty dull place. As some of you may now know after reading my “about” section of my blog or if you know me personally I recently graduated from Norfolk State University with a Bachelor Degree in Sociology.
While I was unsure of really where sociology would take me after school I began to do some research on the possible jobs I could apply for once I finished. I thought about teaching, I thought about working in a juvenile detention center (although that probably would never happen), I even thought about changing my major three or four times but I managed to stick with sociology in hope that something would open up. Although, as I look back now that is probably one of the worst methods to have going through University but I knew something great would open up. At the point of my decision making process so many thoughts were running through my mind, where and what in the world was I about to do!
The job hunt was on.
I had finally decided that I was going to remain in the United States and take a small break for at least the time frame of summer. That also meant taking a break from basketball, which was a bit of shock to some. While I had the opportunity to spend a lot of time on the beautiful Florida beaches I needed some type of income. So I decided it was time to find a summer job that was easy to maintain and didn’t require too much work. I decided to work in retail. Why retail you ask? I have an eye for fashion so what better way than to express my tips to customers and reap the benefits of the commission we were making. But I can tell you now that lasted maybe 2 months. I wanted something better. Something that I would make more income with but that meant it required me to use my degree in some way. That was the plan right guys?
The next job opportunity opened up for me to work as a business assistant at a pretty successful dental surgery. While it was the perfect quiet working environment, I learned very quickly that sitting in front of a desk for 8 hours a day on a full time paycheck Monday through Friday was a little more difficult than expected. My mornings consisted of a 6am wake up and a 7:30am start time. I then wouldn’t get home until 6pm most nights and it would begin all over again the next day. I put everything I had into that job, often working after hours at home and implementing new ways to better our manual and working environment. But after just a short period of time with them I found myself unemployed and fired from my first ever “real” job. I had never been fired before well at least fired via text message. It seemed like every opportunity I had to make money something negative would happen.
While I sit here and tell you this I would be lying if I told you I took it like a soldier. I was so upset and for about a week I just laid in my bed drinking coffee, barely eating and thought what was the point of trying to force myself to work. Then one day it hit me. My life was far better than this. I knew that I was far better than an office assistant, I was a strong minded woman who needed that extra push to pursue my dreams.
So how did I do it? I had to stop allowing negative thoughts enter my head and instead express it through ways in which I knew would benefit me in some way. My first was to write in my journal everything that I felt, thought etc. The second option was to take 2 hours out of my day to listen to my favorite music and research ways in which I could use my skills to make money. And lastly, using those ideas and developing them into a project. Yes, it was hard. It wasn’t the most refreshing feeling or even the greatest thing for my relationship but somehow I ended up on top with nothing but a smile on my face. You cannot let one negative setback ruin the rest of your life’s purpose. You may not know exactly what it is now but everybody has a goal they want to achieve in life. It can be done!
Months later I am here about to finish up two of the most important projects that I started working on after I got fired. But hey I know what I am capable of. Yes it requires more effort but I decide exactly how things are to be run which is basically being my own boss and I deserve to be happy at what I do. That is my little secret to success. Do what makes you happy!
Miss Rose 🌹