Wow, where has the time gone! One minute I was sitting in a classroom listening to a professor lecture and then next minute I find myself halfway across the world with the love of my life planning our future together – crazy right? Sometimes I really feel like I am living in a dream then I quickly snap back into reality and realize hey this is exactly how I envisioned my life to be like! With that being said there are so many possibilities that could happen and plenty more adventures to endure that I cannot afford to be ungrateful with what I have now – it’s pretty bloody fantastic!
In addition, I am at the age where the word “family” has been thrown around. Yes I know I am only 23 but in the next upcoming years, my husband and I would LOVE to have our first child. While the idea of having children may shock some of you to others it may be so exciting – I have to say though, it is pretty exciting to think that you may potentially have a mini-me! Today, I decided to share with you my very first collaboration with the beautiful @mumsbbblog on how to prepare for a baby. With two gorgeous children herself, I thought she was the perfect candidate to answer a few question I have as I begin to plan for a family in the near future – ahhh how exciting!
Here are 10 Questions:
1. Were you ready for a career change? – Maternity leave or part-time work. How does it fit with your career plans? When I fell pregnant with my daughter, I worked as an Estate Agent, I went to peoples houses to value them. I excelled at this job and was then offered a promotion to a Business Development Manager which at just 22 I really felt was a great achievement. However little did I know on Monday I started the new role I already had little Holley cooking! When I did find out and had to tell work, they were less than impressed with me, let me tell you! So in terms know I wasn’t quite ready for a career change, and I had thought when I was pregnant that my baby could go to a nursery and I would return to work. This definitely did not happen. As soon as she was in my arms I felt I never wanted to leave her side. So for the moment, my career is completely on hold and I am totally happy with that and wouldn’t change it for the world. My babies will only be babies for a short moment, I don’t want to miss anything. I can get a job anytime.
2. Considering you have already had your first child and now preparing for your second – did you plan to have your first child or was it something that caught you off guard?<<
hink I have pretty much covered this up top. But just to put you in the picture a little more. Although I had been with my then partner (now husband) for 6 years, we had only just gotten engaged in the January (new year, 2015) when I fell pregnant in February. We had planned to marry a few years later once we had saved to tie the knot abroad. However, these plans changed and we got married in the may instead! It may have happened to us slightly earlier than we had ‘planned,’ but it is, without doubt, the best thing that has ever happened to me. I adore being a Mama.
3. How did you prepare for the extra cost on top of your budget?<<
en I had my first baby I really thought I would have to go back to work quite quickly. We had bought our first home in July 2014, and so we quite new to our mortgage. However, I strongly feel you adapt very quickly to your income (if you’re sensible, where you spend your money). In fact, I now love shopping around for things, using cashback apps, searching for voucher codes and going for a little nosey round the charity shops of a weekend. I also chose to breastfeed both my babies so that has saved a fortune on milk and bottles etc.
4. What are some pointers you can give to our readers on creating space in your apartment for a new baby?<<
ave, to be honest, I’m a minimalist anyway! We did, in fact, live in an apartment when we had Holley, we moved when she was 9 months old to a house. I think for the first few months other than preparing their bedroom there isn’t a huge amount to do. It’s only as they start moving about the place you start to start moving precious things above shoulder height! I would recommend doing a declutter before baby arrives so you can have some free space and also gives you the opportunity to do a garage/car boot sale, and make a little extra money to go towards the baby expenses. I would also invest in a small chest or box to store babies toys.
5. Did your parents encourage you to start a family?<<
It’s a tough question for me: I don’t have any contact with my dad, enough said there! My mum had me at exactly the same age as I had Holley so I do think she would have wanted me to be a little older. That said she was still over the moon. And my mother in law couldn’t wait for us to have children! She was so excited and was always nipping into our place after work with little purchases she had made for our little girl.
6. Now that you have had your first do you feel like you are more prepared for your second child?<< Some ways yes definitely. Holley didn’t really sleep very much at all in her first 12 weeks and so we had really put a lot of thought into this aspect of having a new baby. Luckily, Hugo surprised us and slept quite well in his first few weeks. That said, he has spent a lot of time sleeping in our bed, this is something I was far too scared to do with Holley. But when you have a second child there are certain elements that you automatically feel more confident about. The birth can be very traumatic for some mums, and whilst I’m sure there are people out there who suffered more than me, my birth with Holley was a little more complicated than the average. So as the time drew closer to me having Hugo I really started to get stressed about the birth and obviously, any stress isn’t good for a baby. At least when you have baby number 1 you are still in the dark both the birth. Another thing, with Holley we bought nearly everything in the market and wasted a lot of money. With Hugo we had learnt what we needed to buy and would actually use.
7. If you could go back in time do you think you would have waited to have your first child? Or do you feel there is no age bracket? <<
I am completely happy with my decision to have Holley when I did. I had two younger brothers who I loved and cared for very much, so I guess I had a very strong maternal instinct inside me. Both myself and my husband also agree on how we wanted to parent and the sacrifices that are required to be made in order for us to be the parents we wanted to be. I think if you feel you have done all the things in life you want to then go for it.
8. For our readers, what are some helpful tips you can give on the amount of rest a mother needs. (eg. Planning babies nap time, feeding etc.)<<
hink the answer to this question really does depends on the type of person you are. I used Holley’s and use Hugo’s nap times to get chores done. Whether it be the ironing, washing, meal preparation etc. However, for other moms nap time could be a great opportunity to catch up on some of those zzz’s, as you will be reducing your sleep quite substantially! One Hugo tip I do recommend is routine, routine, routine!
9. You referred to having a child hard work – What helped you over that overwhelming phase?<<
ths! I find if I’ve had a hard day, having a nice hot bubble bath really does the trick for me.i will dim the lights, and have a few tea lights around. And YouTube has some great relaxing mood music. Or in the moments where Holley is throwing a full tantrum either turning my back on her or leaving the room for 5 minutes really helps to change my mindset. I have also downloaded a few apps on my phone to help me connect with other moms in my local area where we can arrange meetups or just have a chat. I find it really useful sometimes talking to other moms with kids the same age as they are usually doing things at the same time and you can help to support each other.
10. As a new mother what are your five most helpful tips when preparing for a new baby? It could be as simple as purchasing a pacifier or baby monitor etc.<<
1. Have some couple time. When baby comes along it’s all about them, so it’s quite nice to have an extra date night or movie on the sofa before baby. And just take five to really appreciate the time together before the big day arrives.
2. Do your research and attend the classes! Me and my husband bought books and went to all the antenatal classes and I really feel we took a lot from it. Admittedly we didn’t the second time around. One exam pls of this was the breastfeeding class my hospital offered. Initially I wasn’t too bothered about breastfeeding: my attitude was if it works it works if it doesn’t I’ll bottle feed. But after the class at the hothouse they completely convinced me that’s how I wanted to feed my babies. They also keep you up to date with all the latest research. I hear a lot of older people say, “well I did it that way with mine and they turned out fine.’ But they do research for a reason and it’s up to you to take the advice or not.
3. Write a pregnancy journal. I bought a book of eBay (the same one) for both of my pregnancies. But you could just use a blank journal. I took weekly bump photos, recorded my cravings and my thoughts and feeling for that week. You can use it to write down your name ideas, important dates, milestone moments, literally anything pregnancy related. I love going back through my journals and reminding myself of my pregnancy experiences. Also when you have completed one for your first baby it’s great to be writing the second one and compare them too.
4. Practice some pregnancy yoga. I bought a simple dvd when I had Holley and did it a couple of times a week, and the same with Hugo. It really helped me to focus on my breathing and feel at one with my body. It helps to de stress and keep your joints nice and supple, ready for birth.
5. Have a pedicure a couple of weeks before your due date. I had a pedicure and massage before both of my births and it just helped me to feel refreshed and relaxed. As well as having picture perfect toes, that all the midwives commented on. Also once baby is here you really don’t get to have any me time so it’s a last little luxury.
So there you have it. I hope that you have gained a few pointers from this wonderful Q & A. If you have any more questions please don’t hesitate to ask.
All the very best.
Miss Rose 🌹